You are enough.
I write this primarily as a note to myself, though everyone is welcome to read it. The theme of these entries is to help purge my system of the toxins that are slowly killing me. Think of it as a letter to myself.
You are always enough.
I know sometimes you feel confused or lost not knowing how to move forward. Sometimes there are times when there is truly no good option for a difficult situation to be resolved. That when these stalemates occur, often it is you who voluntarily walks to the altar as the sacrifice.
Please, as you keep becoming, don’t diminish your light.
Don’t tell people you’re OK when you’re not. Don’t run from feelings of worthlessness and despair. Don’t play pretend to appease others. If you are sad, be it. Happy, joyful, depressed, anxious, lonely, misunderstood, and so much more, be it.
Thankfully, I have lived through enough of these moments to know that outside of these, I am still here. After I dry my eyes, close my smile, or lift my head from my hands, I can breathe. I believe the truest version of love involves heartbreak. Recognizing the times that come after my emotions when I can take a breath and say “and yet here I am.”
I love you.
I love you for continuing to find a path that works for you. For not always taking the easy way just because it’s shorter. For choosing to do difficult things when you don’t want to. For being accountable for your actions, and for being willing to correct them. I love you for trying to understand other people’s perspectives and opinions.
I forgive you.
I forgive you for the lies you’ve told. For the times when you turned your back on someone you could have helped. For getting angry and lashing out at those who offer a hand. For trusting the wrong people. For making decisions based on hurtful intentions and negative emotions. For all the mistakes you think you’ve made. You’re still here and are forgiven.
As I’ve done previously, if you’ve made it through this, I believe you deserve something a bit less personal, but perhaps still applicable with a separate full piece of writing. Thank you for visiting and reading, if these words ease an ounce of suffering, everything is worth it. If they do not, everything is worth it.