13.1

Today, I was useful.

An honored feeling; To be needed.

To provide guidance, support, and care. To willingly carry the burdens of the ones I care about to focus themselves on the task at hand.

It was an early morning, waking up at 4AM, but one I will joyfully do again. While I prepared coffee and mapped our route, I watched her load her running bag, pick out the correct socks, pack snacks, and apply sunscreen. Focused, diligent, careful. She would not let today beat her, and I would not make it more difficult than it would be. The race was ran, the limit was found, and the heart remained full.

It’s special, I’m sure you know, to do “small things” that turn into “big things” and have them be recognized. From the warm up stretches together before the start, to the final words of encouragement, or the extra blueberry bagel I grabbed from the breakfast table for an after race snack. Not only does she see and appreciate these details, it’s reciprocated.

I will never grow weary of seeing her smile, watch as her body relaxes and tension is dropped to the floor, or become desensitized to the way she says I love you. I’ve waited to hear the richness of these words my entire life, and when they leave her lips it is thick and sweet like raw honey from the hive. And what a metaphor to pick, for she is The Queen and I aim to keep her happy.

Never allow your heart to be broken beyond repair, for if it beats, there is hope. Do not be so selfish as to hold onto the most beautiful aspect of yourself. It will break, but do not allow it to remain broken.

Stay focused, stay committed, stay with me.

You are loved.